The navigator spends the rest of Freeday the 7th of Readying contemplating the purpose of his gifts and magic, that evening he began his treatise on high and low magic, that will become one of the more influential texts on the subject, used by jurists to establish Keolish Law on some delicate, previously secret matters.
I had promised Billet Perry my own treatise and theorem on 'good' and 'evil' magic, thoughts on orthodoxy, heresy, woe and weal in magic to help some council looking at the matter from a position of jurisprudence to determine how those like myself might be viewed by rightful authority.
Originally I believed I would be able to make a strong case for a legal framework on magical ritual and powers. I had divided magic into high and low orders of magic separated by intention. I have wrestled with determining intention, especially in the case of my bodyguard.
When I first encountered my friend, he was bent on murdering my fellows, companions on a quest for the crown – rightful authority of this land, to protect and rescue survivors of territory now occupied by the enemy. My friend came from their ranks. He charged them and I used what should always be considered low magic to bind him to me. I did not exhort the gods to grant me a binding, I simply manipulated the keys to the god’s powers through magical knowledge, borrowing or stealing their power for my own intention. It seems though that there may be yet a hint of divine control, will or intent, one cannot it seems totally discount the gods.
My intentions were to take this bound creature and use him to surprise and destroy his former allies who would not suspect him, and to stop him from killing my own people. He was expected to die bound to my will. He did not die however; he lived on and continued traveling with me, endearing him to me. I planned then to rob him and send him on a suicide mission to deliver a message to his former masters; this was my will until the gods interfered.
He turned to the church of the Cuthbertines and became reborn taking for himself a new name and finding acceptance amongst them even honor and adulation. He was a changed man. The binding was broken and he had remained of his own will having found he claimed a new self and enjoyable life, gentle and kind people to share his life with and a home worth protection. I might have doubted his rebirth if not for what happened on the road.
There again we found ourselves in a fight for our lives together. He was suffering the brunt of the enemies force and I had expected instinct and rage to over take him. But he was brought to a halt, a momentary pause. I urged him forward to strike a helpless foe, unconcerned was I with honor then, but he seemed to believe that he was being guided to perhaps have mercy. He was conflicted about striking the defenseless hybrid monsters of the Pomarj. He did not put me at risk in this, only himself. He prevailed once the enemy turned his attention back to him and instinct took over.
I used my own magic in what I believed to be a high manner, to defend us from charging monsters. But when the fight was over we discovered we had only killed a family, a male, a female and an infant or juvenile giant monster, this troubled me as these were creatures bred like my friend, and taught to work or fight for the evil masters of the Orcish Empire. They may only have been seeking to escape war and bondage but I killed them.
My friend might have found a better way for us, and them. I did not let it happen. What god and what intention then would pronounce judgments on my actions? Would the court at Niole Dra hold my actions just in binding my bodyguard? And if I had robbed him and sent him off to die? Would they judge me an evil ally of the Orcish Empire for bringing this warrior who was a chief of an enemy tribe to our lands? Is the murder of the slave monster child a stain on my honor though it will likely serve the long term security interests of the Uleki and Keoish people?
I decided that I could not offer a treatise on high or low magic, good or evil. There are few ways to concretely discern one from the other. One cannot judge intentions, as outcomes are often not what were intended. My body guard may yet be a pawn of the enemy, my taking mercy on him might be the will of Gruumsh or it might be the hand of Cuthbert, and serve a greater purpose. I cannot claim to have used the powers of the gods without their consent though I did not exhort them for aide as a priest does, no wizard then should then be outlaw in these lands.
Let him be judged then by his actions. What he does with his magic within his control. Let murder be murder be it by poison, sword, sling, and bow or spells that command fire from the sky. That there should be some acts of magic some knowledge forbidden then to men; magic from which no good can come?
Indeed I must admit there are some actions reprehensible to me and most I would say should be forbidden simply to know, teach or keep. Animating the dead renders the spirits of the departed in a tortured state, and is thus most vile and evil. It destroys their souls and corrupts them and the undead wish only to work to devour the living. What good can come from this? There may be other acts or miracles that I do not yet know that I shall discover in time and I will continue my treatise based on those findings.
For now I am happy to have learned that those creatures we discovered on the road to Havenhill were causing some trouble for the Shirefolk of Nob. I would rest easier oddly knowing they had murdered and that their painful deaths at my hands were more justified. Right now I feel ill and am wracked with guilt; haunted by the overwhelming full sensory memory of the previous day. I am concerned too that my callous disregard for life different from my own matrix, and more akin to my bodyguards may have put him off a bit. Made him question my nature, I must endeavor to redeem myself in his eyes to be right with my own heart.
And I am left with a question; what for then my powers? What is his will that has remained hidden but obviously so? Am I a force for entropy, chaos and destruction or can I retain my own gentle nature I so much preferred before these events? Is the magic making me an enemy of men as well as monster? Am I a creature not unlike the Sarge, made of something else that beyond the laws of man?
